Today is my last day of being really really busy, then tomorrow I have no gigs, but still have to do work, and then I'm busy again. I like telling you I'm busy as it means you probably all go round saying things like 'who's busy? That Tiernan is, he is.' And maybe you'll go round shouting at bees saying ' if you think you're busy, you should see that Timan Doobie'. I am creating an illusion that will hopefully completely cover up the fact that I am spending at least half of today mooching around in a hoodie, eating breakfast. Yes, half a day of breakfast. Some of you might correctly assume that eating breakfast is 'being busy' and I would agree. I am usually unable to do anything else while eating breakfast and that definitely falls under the definition of 'engaged in activity'. You might take this admittance to mean that when I previously stated my level of business that I was merely stating I had been eating breakfast all week. While I would not condone you for thinking such awesome thoughts, as believe me I plan, at some point in my life to have a week long breakfast, its not true.
Nope, I've been all over the bloomin' country this week and inbetween, as well as a few other writing bits, I'm trying to write an entirely new show in time for my slot at the Leicester Comedy Festival in two weeks. Yep two weeks. Seems like a pretty impossible task doesn't it? Not for a Tiernan it isn't. Oh no, hang on, I've got it wrong. Its massively difficult, especially for me. So far the subject matter has changed about 6 times, the current one doesn't have an ending, and most importantly, there are no jokes in it. This might all be hampered by the fact I'm still not sure if I can go to Edinburgh this year. Despite a decent rummage in our garden I have not yet found any buried treasure, and despite not having sent off any sponsorship letters, no one has got back to me about it. Things look rather bleak for finding large wads of cash. What I don't ever get, is that when I'm very busy, I still somehow appear to be poor. Yet I remember in my first job out of uni, the CEO appeared to do fuck all, but was stinking rich. I think I will use this principal to say that doing nothing = rich. After the next few weeks of endless gigging are over, I'm going to put my feet up and watch the moolah roll in I reckon.
And now for a bit of self promotion. I figure if you read this daily dross you might be interested in coming to see me live. Its often better than this blog. For example, I'm actually there, I often say more words than I put in this blog, and I'm only shit 10-15% of the time unlike this blog. In fact, quite often, people ask when I'm gigging near them. I do have all my listings on my website but I understand that you are all as lazy as me. So ignore what I've written about my new show, ahem, and have a look at these rather ace things that are coming up and come along in regional categories:
Feb 9th - Fat Tuesday this Tuesday! Its a stupidly awesome line-up and there are still tickets left! Get them here:
FAT TUESDAY FEB 9TH TICKETS
Feb 10th - London Comedy Improv at the Phoenix - its been recommended in Time Out and features yours truly alongside the
excellent Tara Flynn, Rufus Hound and Ewen Macintosh. See here:
LONDON COMEDY IMPROV FAN PAGE
March 9th - There is a Fat Tuesday between this one and the Feb 9th one, but this one is extra special. Its the 5th birthday
charity special with all proceeds going to the Meningitus Trust. So far we have got a pretty special line-up with
more to be confirmed. There will also be party hat, games and cake.
FAT TUESDAY 5TH BIRTHDAY TICKETS
Feb 21st - Leicester Comedy Festival Solo Show - which I've written and finished. Promise. Ahem. Tickets here:
LEICESTER COMEDY FESTIVAL TICKETS
FOR SCOTCH PEOPLE:
MARCH 13th - Glasgow Comedy Festival Solo Show - by then, it will be 3% more finished than in Leicester. Exciting!
GLASGOW COMEDY FESTIVAL TICKETS
FOR NORTHERN IRISH FOLKS:
FEB 19th and 20th - I'm at the Belfast Laughter Lounge on both nights. Should be ace. Last time I was in Belfast I got
introduced after some anti-English vitriol as being ' a fucker all the way from England'. Fingers crossed
that happens again:
LAUGHTER LOUNGE TICKETS
That's all. IF you're complaining 'cos there's nothing near you, then look at my website gig list at www.tiernandouieb.co.uk where there are loads more gig listed. If you're complaining I am coming near you, then check the dates and go away for the weekend while I'm there.
Tonight Sheffield! And tomorrow the world! Or not. Probably not. I will also not say 'Sheffield: A place where they grow catering experts'. Ok, I might.